JERRY: Why do you invite these women over if they annoy you so much?
ELAINE: They're my friends, but they act as if having a baby takes some kind of talent.
JERRY: C'mon, you want to have a baby.
ELAINE: Why? Because I can?
JERRY: It's the life force. I saw a show on the mollusk last night. Elaine, the mollusk travels from Alaska to Chile just for a shot at another mollusk. You think you're any better?
ELAINE: Yes! I think I am better than the mollusk!
KEVIN: I couldn't help overhearing what you were saying.
ELAINE: Oh, I'm sorry.
KEVIN: No, no, I think I agree with you. I mean, all this talk about having babies.
ELAINE: Yeah, like you must procreate.
KEVIN: Besides, anyone can do it.
ELAINE: Oh, it's been done to death.
(Episode: The Soul Mate. Basic premise of this clip is that Elaine has met a guy that shares her same detest for the idea of having children. Of course, later in the episode, she changes her mind, after her man of the episode, Kevin, get a vasectomy).
I always think about this scene from Seinfeld, because let's be honest, we all grow up thinking that it's just soooo easy to get pregnant and sooo easy to have a baby and raise kids. Right?! Then reality hits. It's not soooo easy. Ok.....so I'm 30 years old and I've never been one to worry about my age. I plan just about every single thing that goes on in my life, but for some reason I never thought about my wedding or even kids when I was growing up. Even when I met Nick, my husband, I thought about getting married but never obsessed about it as I tend to do with other things.... As for having kids, I was always the one to think "yes, I want them, but it'll happen when it happens". Age was never an issue. After all, my mom was 40 when she had my brother....I have nothing to worry about, right? So for the past 7 years I've always known Nick and I would have kids one day, but it wasn't until last year at this time that we really started talking about it. I still didn't think much about it, and naively thought it would be super easy to conceive, so I figured I'd go off birth control and BAM get pregnant (yes, I'm naive, it's true, I mean most of my friends haven't had kids yet, and those who have haven't really confided in me about how difficult it was...or if it was at all). I mean we see pregnant women of all shapes, sizes, backgrounds, ages, etc. all the time (especially when working in a supermarket!) so it's hard not to think; "how hard can it be?!".
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| Source: iStock Photo |
As a little background, I went off birth control over 5 months ago, after being on it for...well....almost half my life. I figured my body would go right back to its normal...you know....ways, pretty fast. I gave myself 2 months, but then after four months, I got a little nervous (my body didn't go back to its normal ways). I went to the doctor to get my hormones tested, as well as my thyroid, just to make sure everything was ok. After all, I'm small, very small, and I was nervous something might be wrong (and let's not forget I had an eating disorder for five years). Then I started freaking out that maybe I have celiac, because while my labs all came back normal (yeah!), my doctor said my liver enzymes were high (it's a sign of Celiac, apparently, according to WebMD, bad idea to go to that site). So what happened? STRESS! The one thing everyone says not to do when you're trying to conceive. As it turns out my liver enzymes were likely high because of my daily small glass of red wine, as well as my apparently way too high consumption of niacin (oops, as a dietitian I should have known to stop my B-complex when I started taking a prenatal. I'm completely embarrassed).
Seven years ago tip number one (see below) would have been the reason I could never have gotten pregnant. I was only just starting to eat normal after healing from an eating disorder that lasted from my senior year in high school through age, well....23 or so (at that time it was more like disordered eating, not an eating disorder. Yes, there is a difference). I was basically a normal weight, just a little under. Now? I'm right where I should be.
Number six on the list above has been taken very seriously lately. Eat more chocolate? Done.
And then there was this list. Fertility foods. Ummm.....I eat each and every one of these foods already (aside from a few that contain FODMAPs, such as cherries). So......what more can I do?!
Well, I'll tell you what I can do, a few more things, that's for sure. Here is what I've learned thus far, and what I'm doing (and Nick!) to get ready for pregnancy (this is after reading some more, talking to several other women, chatting with my mother, going to a new OBGYN, and of course getting my lab work done).....
What I've learned:
- Don't stress. Literally every single person has told me this. Typically when someone says that to me, I just stress more. In this case I'm taking their advice. I'm trying not to think about it too much and I'm just going with the flow. As it turns out it was a good thing that literally the one thing I didn't plan in my life was when I was going to get pregnant (well, until now I suppose). It will happen when it happens. And that's truly the best time.
- While I'm in this stage of my life (actually ready to get pregnant), the most important thing is not to worry, but to relax, enjoy the moment, and treat my body well.
What I'm doing:
- Going to an OBGYN, finally. I am taking progesterone for ten days to jump start everything (ie: menstruation)
- Buying mainly organic foods (especially the dirty dozen foods, linked below)
- Continuing to eat plenty of fruits, vegetables, and healthy fats (I've been into chia seeds lately. Stay tuned for a chia gel smoothie recipe on Monday!)
- Drinking little to no alcohol (ok, it's more like a little. I have about 2-3 ounces of red wine on most nights, because to be honest almost all women have said to me, "Come on Gina, you can drink a little, look at how many people get pregnant without knowing it...and drink a ton! A little should be fine, until you find out your pregnant." Ok, that's advise I like, although the book I'm reading doesn't agree, and I'll probably stop once I start to finally ovulate)
- Reducing my caffeine intake (I'm down to about 150 mg from 250 mg. BAM!)
- Working out less vigorously (no more 90 minute runs, followed by arm workouts. No It's 45 minutes, max)
- Eating more. Yes, I've been consciously eating more. This doesn't mean I'm eating junk, but I'm sort of telling myself it might not be a bad idea to put on another pound or two. AlthoughI did get my body fat measured the other day and it was 26%. Note to self: never get a body fat measurement again (that's not even in the range of "fitness"!).
- Eating mainly gluten free. While I don't have Celiac, I know my body doesn't respond well to gluten (I do have "Gluten Sensitivity"). As you know I've been experimenting with gluten free grains, and I'll tell you I'm loving them! Amaranth is a favorite of mine, and soon I'll be posting a millet granola recipe.
What Nick's Doing
- Exercising more (ok, not necessarily on the elliptical, but definitely outside in the garden and running)
- Eating more fruits and veggies (as if he wasn't getting enough before). And yes, I'm trying to buy organic versions for him as well, especially the ones with the more delicate and thin skin, such as blueberries, and also produce from the updated EWG Dirty Dozen Plus list
- Consuming less cocktails. And even though this is me in the photo below, he does tend to enjoy a nightly cocktail (typically calorie-free juice or seltzer water and vodka)....while he's still drinking one each night, he's stopping at one (two is rare now)
Here are the links to the two fantastic article from Today's Dietitian; Eating to Fuel Fertility and Improving Men's Fertility
So, that's my update for now. While I don't really want to put too much pressure on me, or Nick, I have given myself a pretty reasonable goal (or at least I think it's reasonable) to get pregnant by 2014. We shall see! If not, well obviously we'll just keep trying! Enjoy your Friday everyone, and have a wonderful weekend (did I mention I get to meet Alton Brown on Sunday?!?!?!?!?!?!?!).
QUESTION: Do you have any fertility tips you'd like to share?
Thanks for reading!
The Candid Rd
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I am no where near that stage in my life yet, but these are really good tips !
ReplyDeleteTotally bookmarking this to have as reference for a year or two from now. I think it's great you're looking to stress less - thanks for sharing so that we can all learn! (Well, I'm mainly think of me, but other people too, sure :P )
ReplyDeleteP.S. My whole life is a Seinfeld episode!
P.P.S. Have a great time meeting Alton Brown! (Did I mention I'm a little jealous? ;) )
It sounds like you have a good handle on this. Wishing you all the best!
ReplyDeleteWhen my husband and I first started trying I got really good advice from my gynecologist. She said that trying to get pregnant is a terrible and most horrifying experience... and she was right! Especially because both my sister and sister-in-law got pregnant on their very first month off the pill... TWICE! So suffice it to say, I had some very uncommon examples going into the whole thing.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, the best thing to do is to stay positive, which it looks like you're doing. I don't know about your husband, my mine stopped eating soy and stopped bike riding when we were trying. I can't guarantee that is what did the trick for us, but it didn't take long after.
It's so true that we tend to take it for granted that we can get pregnant whenever we want. But the truth is more women struggle with fertility issues than we imagine, they just don't share this kind of things in public.
ReplyDeleteI'm in no place to give you advice but I'd say not stress about it is really important... and then timing the "act" helps. You need to know when is your most fertile moment... you know what I mean? That increases the chances a lot. Good luck dear, can't wait to hear all about it! :)
This is helpful for so many women who struggle with infertility. Good luck Gina- such an exciting and nerve wracking time of your life, but your time will come soon I am sure!
ReplyDeleteJust catching up on your posts Gina. Sending you best wishes and good luck!
ReplyDeleteavoid long time sleeping and ignore the habit of smoking and drinking alcohol.
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